So, my husband plays D&D on a few Saturdays a year and he is gone from around 11am to 11pm. Since I have a considerable lack of female friends here, or the ones that I do have are busy or are spending time with their significant others, I find that I must create something fun or useful to do with myself. Otherwise, I sit home a little pouty and that is certainly not a good thing for either of us.
My previous activities have included going to Chinatown to get my hairs did (they are done and don't want to do anything different at this time), taking a tour (still a possibility, though sometimes this is not so fun on your own), or completing a project in the apartment (see above about the potential of a pouty attitude). I am looking to do a cooking class, but that is not until evening, so my day is free.
Volunteer, I said to myself, do some good in the community. I began the search only to be frustrated and amazed by the abundance of hoops one must jump through in order to help another human, community or animal out in this city.
I began with the New York Cares website and found a couple of things that would be right up my alley. I could pull some weeds in a park in Harlem or go to Astoria and teach some folks how to use the computer. I am all set to "register" only to find out that you must first attend an "orientation" seminar, none of which are available until August 26th. That sort of misses the mark of volunteering this weekend which is the 14th. Okay, I thought, I will register and go to that orientation seminar so I don't get stuck wanting to help animal or vegetable in the future. Good and done, now onward.
A friend saw my status on FB and suggested that I go to Craig's List because they sometimes have opportunities that might not require a background check, and might provide some "on-the-fly" opportunities. Off to the site I go. Opportunities did abound, but they were not exactly what I had in mind.
1. I could help some 23 year old kid from Westchester find a girlfriend. He is very nice and well educated. So my question is why in the hell is he hoping that someone reading this will automatically see his post and think...oh, I should fix him up with that cute girl down the hall from me...they would make a very cute couple and I know so much about him! Didn't he ever hear of the Craigslist killer?
2. There are plenty of surveys I could fill out - that would be helpful and sitting at my computer answering questions with "sometimes" and "almost never" would really make me feel like I am touching someone's life and building ties with my community. In this category are also testing opportunities at Columbia, but only if you are an active heterosexual who has multiple partners or a black one with fibroids. Since I am neither, that is out too.
3. "Looking for more good people" brings you to a singles website. Ah, well, I don't think that would be very good for my healthy marriage, so I crossed that one off.
4. There was one very sweet post where some guy wants to learn how to ask his deaf girlfriend's hand in marriage in sign language, but I can't help there. If you know sign language, hook this dude up!
5. I could also volunteer for a hair transplant - by that I mean I could get one, not give one...also out or I really would need to head to Chinatown for that haircut.
Okay, so none of these seem like potential opportunities, so I looked at the ASPCA, even though I have sworn to myself, my husband and my family that I would never go in this direction again. We have three rescues - two dogs (one of whom is currently in my lap) and a cat, and it is impossible for me to see animals who don't have a home and not want to do something to remedy that. Most often, that means taking them in. Assuring myself that I could remain steadfast and help without bringing home a litter of malnourished puppies, I went to their website. Well, they too have an orientation, all of which are full until the middle of September with no new dates listed. There is also a $25 processing fee for the application. Okay, it does include a t-shirt, required classes, and after six months of volunteering the required 8 hours a month for six months, you get 20% off at the animal hospital. That might be worth it considering that is where we take our pets and just last week we spent $500 on Mabel's intestinal issues after she ate a disagreeable bone. Really though, all I want to do is pick up some poop, give some animals a little TLC and fill their water bowls. I mean I volunteered in Texas at the ASPCA and did not have to go through all of that, but I did come home with a 99 pound chow-retriever mix name Leo who was headed for the injection room the last day I was there. He eventually went to live with a family on a farm.
On to the NYC Foodback. Good idea, I thought - I would get to touch some lives of real human beings, maybe help peeps with hunger issues. You can only volunteer on Monday through Friday 9:30 to 3:30...well, are most people at work then? The application process there involves giving them your SSN, DL number, your addresses for the last 7 years and previous experience. Wait, they want your previous experience? Does that mean that you should have worked as a grocery stocker? I did wait tables and they do serve food as well, but since this is a weekday only volunteer job, that is out too.
Well, I understand people want background checks if you are working with children, the elderly, or animals. That makes sense, and I see the justification in that. To me, though, pulling weeds in the garden of a city-sponsored old folks home in Harlem, wouldn't warrant a serious look at anyone's past unless, they are worried that you might assault one of the other volunteers. Since they give the address and time, maybe I will just show up on Saturday. If they want to send me home they can...I'll just go get a pedicure and offer to volunteer for the Meredith Moseley-Bennett Foundation.
Jeez!
No comments:
Post a Comment